Preparing for Marriage

Dating is many things, but it is first and foremost a method of discernment: do I feel called to the vocation of marriage? And is this the person I am called to marry?

While you are on the dating journey, check in with some of these resources that may help you on your way.

Are you ready to take the next step? Then…

Congratulations on your engagement! We are delighted for you, and ready to support you as you prepare for married life.

Preparing for marriage in the Diocese of Harrisburg is a process of intentional discernment, accompaniment, and vocational formation that takes at least 9 months. Please contact your pastor shortly after your engagement to begin this immediate phase of preparation.

Preparation consists of the following:

• Canonical Process—the initial interview with the priest or deacon, which includes completion of the canonical forms.
• Pre-Marital Inventory—couples separately complete the inventory and then discuss the results with either the preparing cleric or their mentor couple.
• Formation and Accompaniment—a series of individual gatherings between 1) the couple and their mentor couple, and 2) between the couple and the preparing cleric.
• Retreat—an immersion in the theology of marriage with opportunities for prayerful dialogue and reflection.
• Final Assessment—a meeting, if needed, to determine whether to proceed with the marriage or defer it.
• Liturgical Planning—coordination between couple, clergy, and appropriate liturgical minister to plan the appropriate form of celebration.

To learn more about our guidelines for marriage preparation, please see the complete Common Policy in English, Vietnamese, and Spanish.

When you are ready to register for a retreat, you may choose one of two options: an Engaged Encounter weekend or a God’s Plan for Love day-retreat.

God’s Plan for Love is a single-day program that explores the Church’s teachings on: marriage as a sacrament and a vocation; the human person and God’s design for marriage; and human sexuality. The diocese offers many God’s Plan conferences throughout the year and in a variety of diocesan locations. To view 2026 God’s Plan dates, click here. To view the 2027 God’s Plan dates, click here. 

Catholic Engaged Encounter (CEE) is a weekend retreat for engaged couples to spend time away as a couple and to learn more about the faith and about marriage. On the weekend, couples communicate in depth about their future lives together – their strengths and weaknesses, desires and goals, and their attitudes about money, sex, children, and their role as a family in the church and in society. For more information on Catholic Engaged Encounter, please visit their website here. Upcoming dates include November 12-15, 2026, January 15-17, 2027, May 28-30, 2027 and August 27-29, 2027.

Did you know that the Church has a special Blessing for Engaged Couples? Consider adding this simple and beautiful rite to your preparations.